“Doing nothing is sometimes one of the highest of the duties of man.” – G.K. Chesterton

Somehow it feels crazy that it’s been a whole year and also hard to believe it’s only been a year since things shut down due to COVID. I remember being in the office with my coworkers last February when this all started making the news. I remember I was in the middle of getting a training set up for some managers in Virginia when we got the news that all non-essential travel should be halted. So then I spent a day scrambling to figure out if we could do the training remotely. Then we started hearing that big groups of people shouldn’t gather together. Given that I was working for a healthcare company who’s patients were in the high risk category for COVID, it seemed prudent to be as cautious as possible with our teammates in our facilities. So we opted to cancel the training all together.

At this point we were all still in our offices together, but on high alert to wash our hands frequently. There were Lysol wipes stationed near the elevators and hand sanitizer at every corner. We would sing together in the bathrooms while washing our hands to make sure we hit the recommended 20 seconds, if not more. There were two kinds of people during that time. Those that still thought this was no big deal and that it would blow over quickly and those of us (yes I’m included in this second group) who feed off of worst case scenario discussions. I stopped going into the office a few days before it shut down officially because my commute was on crowded public transportation and I started to feel exposed and unsafe. I told my manager I would make an effort to drive to the office 1 or 2 days a week, trying to balance being present with the high cost of parking downtown. I was very lucky to work for a team that allowed for this kind of flexibility.

A few days after I made that decision, the city shut down for all non-essential workers. Our company complied and had anyone who could work remotely do so effective immediately. The announcement was on a Friday and I was already at home. I decided not to go back to the office to pick up anything because I basically had everything I needed to work with me already. I was headed up to the mountains to spend a few days with my family, including my sister, her husband and kids who had flown in. There had been some hemming and hawing about whether they should get on the plane but decided the risk didn’t seem high enough to opt for driving.

We all gathered up at the mountain house that Friday night, planning to ski the following morning. Together we saw the alerts that they would be closing the lodges for dining and limiting sharing lift seats. The next morning we woke up to the news that the mountain was shutting down all skiing. The mountain towns had been the first hit with the virus due to spring breakers unknowingly bringing it with them during travel. So these little tourist towns were on high alert. For the next few days we all tried to relax, but ended up glued to our phones and the television as we watched the news get worse and worse. Eventually we all cut our trip short, my sister and her family opting to rent a minivan and drive home rather than taking their return flight.

Prior to going up to the mountains, I had made a big trip to Costco to stock up on food and other essentials. Some people teased me a bit, but it was like a Pavlovian trauma response having lived through a few hurricane seasons. My monkey brain took over and said “something is happening, make sure you have food!” So we ended up working through all that over the next couple weeks without needing any big grocery store runs. By the time we started going back out to stores, everything had changed. And that’s what we have been living with for the past year.

I’ve seen people talking about this being a time for mourning and remembrance of the lives lost this past year. I’ve seen others talking about this being a time to commemorate and celebrate that we’ve made it this far. And I resonate with both viewpoints. We’ve come this far and lost a lot along the way, some much more than others. So make sure you take time to acknowledge those feelings, both of sadness and gratitude. And always hope for what is yet to be.